I have travelled the globe (and all I got was this lousy t-shirt).

So the Grand Schnuppa feels it would be good to update you all on what he has been doing over the last 3 years (though he is sure that for you, without his guidance, it has felt like interminable aeons).
Well first of all the Grand Schnuppa has taken a wife. The Mrs G.S. is as formidable and awe inspiring a woman as you would expect such a man as the G.S. to choose and that being said he has only nice things to say about her (mainly cause she is the only thing other than flan that the G.S. is scared of). She has one flaw and that is that she hails from some small, somewhat backward nation known as Americania.
Americania is not a bad place, there are some very pretty mountains, however it does have issues. For starters it appears that they stop teaching children how to speak and spell when they are approximately 20 months old. The result of this is that no adults have successfully mastered the English language, words such as y'all and bizarre accents are prevalent to such an extent that they can't even pronounce the letter Z correctly. Also for all of you Americanise out there the letter U is in the spelling of many words, please use it. The Grand Schnuppa has decided that the best course of action is to relocate his official residency to Americania in order to try and deal with some of these issues.
The other thing Grand Schnuppa has decided on is that his rise to power would probably be based launch through the medium of a grass roots movement. The G.S. has always been a man of the people, though marked for greatness from an early age he has not lost the common touch. That being said the G.S. has taken up farming as the most logical place to start a grass roots movement is probably the middle of a field of grass.

Honey I'm home!

So it's been about 3 years since the Grand Schnuppa regaled you with stories of his adventures or bestowed upon the World his wisdom and guidance. The G.S. would like to be able to excuse his absence with some credible reason but the truth is that he just couldn't be bothered communicating with people who are frankly not often worth the effort.

Having said that though the Grand Schnuppa has looked around, surveying his dominion and has passed judgement on society. What a flipping mess! Seriously people what are you playing at? Is that really how your mothers raised you?

So the Grand Schnuppa in his benevolent wisdom and with great humility has decided to re-enter the blogosphere with its many sordid and torrid qualities in order to somehow show you all exactly what you are doing wrong and what you should be doing about it. So be prepared over the next few weeks for some more posts and be prepared to listen or so help me I will pull this car over!